Thought I would comment on where I am with those:

1. Learn more about photography and how my camera works. - IN PROCESS!   Learned about Appeture and my F settings
2. Finish reading “The Faith of Barrack Obama” and review it on my blog. Well, I finished it,  never reviewed it – but did enjoy it and learned a lot.
3. Start putting me first again – excercising regularly, taking some time for me without feeling bad, locking the bathroom door, etc. Not so much, still struggling with this one.
4. Make my house more a home – hang pictures on the walls, fix small issues in the walls, maybe tile the kitchen, make the toy/office more cohesive and look nice, general fix it and clean up things.  DONE (not tiling, but everything else)!
5. Become a member of a church  Still need to work on this, you know the GOING part.
6. Have a couple of play-dates for Aubrey  DONE!  LOTS!
7. Say yes more often!  DONE! LOTS!  But then no time for #3
8. Have 2 overnight trips with my husband (without the kids) DONE!
9. Finish the projects I start before starting new ones, cook more, make bagels from scratch, find a cupcake recipe I like.  DONE!

WOW, I feel a lot better about where I am in that list!  And I did a lot more than I thought I had.

“The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new” – Beckett

Now, go drink one for me.

What am I?  A mother, a wife, a friend, a software product manager, and a woman trying to try new things (sewing, knitting, going green, cooking, baking).

What did I think I would be?

From College On:

1. I always thought I would be a mother, I never thought it would be this much work or it would be this hard or I would feel so insecure about doing the right thing
2. I thought I would be a big time business person, upper management, big company.

In High School:

1. A singer
2. A writer
3. An Actor
4. An Editor
5. Living in New York City
6. Have an in home chef and maid

In Middle School:

1. A writer
2. A musician (Piano)

In Elementary School:

1. In the movie Grease

Apparently my psyche was trying to escape reality last night. I picked Jen and the girls up from the airport. They have been visiting the in-laws for the last week.

I had a good time being a bachelor again. Just me, the dog, the guitar, and my computer. A true geek-a-thon.

So, I pick them up and they are all sick with fever, coughing, runny noses.

Ugh.

Bad night’s sleep follows and in the early morning I wake up and remember a dream about a girl I kissed in college that happens to not be my wife. The dream was that we met up again and I gave her a hug. It felt really good.

Here’s more details about the college days: I was mad about this woman. I kissed her once and it was just the hint of her lips brushing against mine but I recall trembling and feeling high.

So there you go. Do we ever get over these things? Are we supposed to?

1. a guitar virtuoso (a la Steve Vai or Joe Satriani)
2. a world champion hacky sack nut
3. a rhinoceros
4. a pug (big surprise there)
5. a confident speaker of Spanish
6. a famous post-deconstructionist ab-ex painter with just a touch of visual irony in all my works
7. an author, specifically a novelist
8. a philosopher (I still have tons of incomprehensible books lining the shelves… one day, Hegel, one day…)
9. a man with tattoos
10. a professional skateboarder
11. a screenprinter
12. an astronomer (that was a brief infatuation)
13. Ponce de Leon
14. a woman (just for a day, or a week, to see what it’s like to be a woman)
15. E.T.

Emily: tag, you’re it.

Made this while watching Lost last night. Jen said it made her smile. Hope it does the same for you.

Friday night I came home feeling really jazzed becuz despite tapering off my antidepressant medication (in preparation for a switch), I’ve been feeling really positive and inspired. Then I panicked because I thought I had flubbed up and forgotten the anniversary of my father’s death and got mad at myself and channeled this anger inter cutting out the whale from a piece of plywood (I have plans to incorporate the whale into a frame for a chalkboard I’m going to make). So, I went down to the basement and started cutting, sawdust spraying everywhere. Then I sanded Mr. Beluga. By the time I was done, I was covered in sawdust.

Then, yesterday, to celebrate V-Day, we decided to insulate the attic. I spent an hour pulling up plywood from the attic floor so we could blow in the 80% recycled content insulation we had acquired. Idiot me — it was dusty as hell up there and I didn’t wear a mask. I did wear a mask for the blowing in of the insulation, but that didn’t seem to matter.

If you know the kind of sinus infection prone fool that I am, you’re shaking your head right now (cue Cher’s “If I Could Turn Back Time” here).

So, after a week on Penicillin for strep throat, I now seem to have a sinus infection.

The anniversary of my father’s death is tomorrow by the way. I’m going to work, going to stay positive, blow my nose and make a list of ground rules for myself in regards to woodworking.

Maybe that sounds callous. People deal with grief in different ways. I guess that’s my way.

In positive news, I still feel really inspired. I’ve been noodling on my guitar lately, learning some easy tunes by Mudhoney and Dinosaur Jr. I got Keith Smith’s book about exposed bindings on Friday, and am exicited to start learning about this unique way of making books.

Here’s an example of an exposed sewing spine:

Model Coptic binding created in 2003 by Ratbasket. This is a modern version of a traditional Coptic binding, using wooden boards, Mohawk Superfine paper (as opposed to papyrus or parchment), and 18/3 Irish linen thread. The boards are treated with a commercial wood wax.